Breezes

Have you ever been in a hot place where the air seemed to just sit suspended in place with no visible movement?  Such conditions make me feel like I’m living in a photograph; nothing moves, it’s just a snapshot of life. Here in the tropics such moments are much too frequent. Out in the jungle villages you are surrounded by forests of very tall trees and tangles of vegetation that are sentries that will not allow breezes to pass by. On many days I have sat perspiring in the humidity longing for movement of the air. I have timed the breezes and found that on average, on a “photograph” day, the air will stir about once in each fifteen minutes.  That means fifteen minutes of sweating with the weight of the humid air seeming to press drenched clothing against the skin. Uncomfortable indeed.

When that quarter-hour breeze comes it brings relief, pleasure, comfort…It brings a feeling of renewal if only for a few seconds. As the breeze passes and heads off to touch some other weary sufferer I’m compelled to reach out a hand in some futile attempt to grasp it, to cling to it, to make it mine. Yet I know the precious wind is not mine to own or control; it’s for everyone, for others who like me long for it to refresh their weary soul.

I’m sitting beneath a thatched roof on a springy deck made of pona palm wood, perspiring, longing for that small movement of air, regretting that I forgot to bring my hand-fan to fan myself, and the Spirit of the Lord whispers to me, “I am the breeze.” I listen again but hear no audible voice. Not even the wind. The fifteen minutes are not up. “I am the breeze, let me refresh you.” I pause. I think. Then I know in my own spirit that I am to think about the longing that I feel for the refreshing of a cool breeze. I must compare this longing with my longing for the Lord.

As I think, I’m ashamed that my craving for air too often supercedes my craving for the refreshing of the Lord in my life.  And I’m made to realize that in reality the suffering in the heat is meant to keep me on my toes and calling out to the Lord for strength, for endurance, for renewal, not just to endure the heatwave, but to be all I can be for His glory, even when I’m not just out of my comfort zone, but when the comfort zone has ceased to exist!

Wait. What’s that rustling of the leaves in the trees? Look, the clouds are moving across the sun…small droplets of rain are beginning to fall. A cool wind caresses my face and chills my body as it dries the perspiration from my skin. I rise from my chair and step down from my “photograph”. Refreshing has come outwardly, peace has come inwardly. It’s not just about the wind now.